Underachiever Needs Guidance

Sylvia Rimm
Tue, 08 Mar 2016 21:00:00 -0800
Lifestyle

Q: I've read your books and visited your website to read about underachievement in school. My son is 16-years-old and has shown many signs of underachievement for quite some time. He is a junior in a public high school.

We are considering the possibility of transferring or supplementing some of his learning environment to a one-on-one teaching school. Do you have an opinion you can share about group vs. one-on-one teaching for underachievers or public classrooms vs. private one-on-one lessons?

Thanks for all your help!
Updated: Wed Mar 09, 2016

Q: I've read your books and visited your website to read about underachievement in school. My son is 16-years-old and has shown many signs of underachievement for quite some time. He is a junior in a public high school.

We are considering the possibility of transferring or supplementing some of his learning environment to a one-on-one teaching school. Do you have an opinion you can share about group vs. one-on-one teaching for underachievers or public classrooms vs. private one-on-one lessons?

Thanks for all your help!

A: It is always important to determine what has triggered your son's underachievement. Sometimes the cause stems from an early history of schoolwork being too easy and the assumption that his work would always continue to be easy if he is smart. Developing a strong work ethic is critical to taking on the challenges of middle and high schools. Other times, peer pressure instigates the underachievement. He may be in a friendship group of students who don't value school achievement. Also, there could be attention problems or learning disabilities that were missed when he was younger. Family dynamics may also play a role in the underachievement of children when one parent is easier than the other, or a parent gives a child power against the school by blaming teachers for his problems. Understanding your son's reasons for his underachievement is crucial to determining how to reverse his problems.

There isn't one easy answer, but in order for you to help your son reverse his underachievement and prepare for college, assisting him to make the adjustment to a traditional school environment is crucial. Sometimes there is good reason for adjunct one-to-one tutoring in a specific subject or coaching assistance in organizing his work, but I don't think that home schooling or individual instruction works as a substitute for school at his age when he is so close to graduating high school. Since an underlying issue for underachievement is often the inability to function in competition, isolating him from a competitive environment will not allow him to develop the grit and perseverance required to move forward to college. I do hope you will try some of the approaches I recommend in my book, "Why Bright Kids Get Poor Grades And What You Can do About It," (Great Potential Press, 2008).

You may also wish to take your son to visit colleges and universities where he could attend if he reverses his underachievement. Hearing about the requirements for admission and visualizing what it would feel like to be a university student could be very motivating to your son. It certainly would help him to develop realistic goals for his future.

For free newsletters or articles entitled Learning Disabilities, Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, Underachievement, and/or Visiting Colleges and Decision Making, send a self-addressed, stamped envelope to the address below. Dr. Sylvia B. Rimm is the director of the Family Achievement Clinic in Cleveland, a clinical professor of psychiatry and pediatrics at the Case Western Reserve University School of Medicine, and the author of many books on parenting. More information on raising kids is available at www.sylviarimm.com. Please send questions to: Sylvia B. Rimm on Raising Kids, P.O. Box 32, Watertown, WI 53094 or srimm@sylviarimm.com. To read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.